Me Ulck, and me want date with hot man meat soon. Me like to hunt foxes, pheasant, and wooly mammoth in Minneapolis park system. Me eat good! Me love warm Minnesota winters! Me horny for sex with modern gay man but don’t tell wife because Ulck in cave closet. Me like anal, oral and me TOP! But right Daddy could flip Ulck! If interested look for Ulck down by big river before fire rises in sky. Me will be carrying big spear!
While jogging through the thrift store today I found a copy of an old record by the band Steam. It contains the amazing soul-rock anthem “Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye” and a lot of other pseudo Motown diddies. Most importantly it’s got some very nice bathhouse images of the band on the front and back cover. What is it about moist young hippies with their sideburns and musky little mustaches that gets me all in kerfuffle? I dunno… I’m pretty sure the band regrets this album cover but I’m also pretty sure a lot of closeted boys in the early 70s were happy with the managements decision on this one.
Oh my! It’s Big Dan the Van Man chilling in his van! He might be wearing a wedding band, but don’t worry man, he understands. Talk about the blues band playing at the stand. Stare at his tan, Sunblock! give him a hand. Always good to come with a plan. Because there might be room in that van for one more man, MAN! You never know until you ask Big Dan the Van Man.