I found this old pamphlet up in my parents attic the other day and could not resist taking a pic of that monumental ass. I believe it’s a Michelangelo sculpture,￼￼ but not sure which one. The other muscly dude wrapped around his legs and face pressed up against his thigh is enough to drive one batty with dirty thoughts. I can hardly believe this was printed in 1959. I guess if something back then was￼ considered “fine art” it got a pass. Honestly if this flyer was printed today I don’t think they would use this image. Man butt is no longer considered the height of beauty in the art world￼￼, but don’t fear my horny brethren, here at Urban Mountain Man it always will be.
I had a strange horny surprise at the grocery store tonight. This goddamn, sexy grey bearded cro-mag daddy donning a weiner lei, and baring a weiner tattoo appeared in the frozen meat aisle. His name is Carl. Even though he was only a cardboard cut out for Johnsonville brats, I really felt we had a connection. Although we didn’t talk much, or at all, and he barely looked at me, that is on par with most guys I meet at the bar, so this just might work out.
While jogging through the thrift store today I found a copy of an old record by the band Steam. It contains the amazing soul-rock anthem “Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye” and a lot of other pseudo Motown diddies. Most importantly it’s got some very nice bathhouse images of the band on the front and back cover. What is it about moist young hippies with their sideburns and musky little mustaches that gets me all in kerfuffle? I dunno… I’m pretty sure the band regrets this album cover but I’m also pretty sure a lot of closeted boys in the early 70s were happy with the managements decision on this one.
We at UMM are pro LOVE. To be more specific, we are PRO MANLOVE! We love MEN and we want MEN to love us. We want to be IN LOVE with MEN, with all the entanglements. Nothing says this better than a kiss. Some str8 and bi guys say “I don’t kiss man” but give me a fearless BUD to kiss me gentle, only mashing mouths when the passion calls for it. Dicks pressed up to each other like long lost pubic friends. Arms wrapped into one body mass but feeling utterly naked and at home. Hoping yer dream cums true.
Here at UMM we are beginning the process of creating an online shop and/or a gallery with erotic man art and designs for sale. We’re still in the early stages of production so make sure you check back in about month when our “shop” will be open. Until then UMM will be posting images of Mortimer Pye’s drawing and sketching excursions at urbanmountainman.com, Tumblr, and other social media channels. If there are any images on the site that pique yer interest feel free to let us know. Mortimer Pye likes nasty suggestions.
Sometimes the right filter can get you off. The right setting. The right combination of moves. The right”Action” if you know what I mean you photoshop freak. Maybe one day I’ll teach you my secrets, but for now, dig my digi-psychedelic visage.
Slogans are awesome. The best ones can persuade, empower, inform, and even make you chuckle. When you put a slogan on your t-shirt, it’s seen as statement of your own personal beliefs, politics, or identity. With that in mind, what if you are a LGBT kinkster who’s looking for casual apparel that represents your deviant side? What if you’re the type who doesn’t give a rats ass that your kink might get someone else’s fur in a tangle? Where can you go for this type of personal branding? Pervyology.com that’s where.
In the late 60s early 70s hippy counter culture slogans were everywhere. When I first started perusing through the many pages of the online shop, Pervyology.com, it reminded me of my aunts button collection pinned to the drapes in her teenage pot-den in the basement at grandmas and grandpas house. Slogans like “Homosexuality is a Pain in the Ass“ and “Give Generously to Your Local Sperm Bank” rang through my brain and tweaked my young pervy intellect. Pervyology.com carries on this old school hippy biker t-shirt tradition, but for the LGBT and kink communities. The site has a menu for various kink subgroups like Puppy Shirts, Bear Shirts, Transgender, etc. But I suggest you check out the LGBT section which seems to house all of the T-shirt designs from all the subgroups. It’s a good read and you might even get offended, but most likely you will find your dirty little secret boldly printed on a garment you can buy online. I bought “REAL MEN EAT ASS,” a sentiment that I’ve had for a very long time but never pondered that I could find it on a T-shirt. (See my blog review of this T ) This site covers a wide range of sentiments that are expressed with an unforgiving, but lovable, Daddy voice. Some of the slogans are little cliche and some a little wordy, but a lot of them are crafted just right to tweak your brain and get your desire pumping. Using clip art, and Disney style illustrations (mostly of bears and pups,) the designs create a cozy style that is both familiar and perverse. No fancy fonts, just unadulterated easy to understand kinky slogans, that will make your chest stand out for your next party, night on the town, or slutty evening with your buds.
Pervyology.com is owned by a a Bear, a Cub, and a Pup. They are into roller derby big time and there is a huge section of the site dedicated to the sport. They also have a selection of puppy/animal masks, paws, tails and a few other random fetish items for sale. But the slogans are the big star here. They make the site an entertaining and fascinating read whether or not you plan on making a purchase, but we implore you to make a purchase. We know one will pique your interest. Maybe buy one one for Father’s Day?
Many men complainin’ ‘bout shavin.’ Sayin’ “it’s not nat’rl!!!” Shavin’ that is. But what can you do if you like to. Shavin’ that is. Makin’ yer titties shakin’ Causin’ Yer gunt to itchin’. Makin’ you horny less bitchin’. Sometimes it feels right when it feels wrong. Sometimes it feels “DAMN RIGHT!” A little off the side, a trim from behind. Yer buddy naked tonight, with a razor in the light. So in the furry end don’t condescend, and please… Don’t judge a man by what he uncovers, just how he treats his lover.