Category: Pop Culture

Burly Bear Wrestler Chest Congestion

Yes the flu season was a real Bear this year. If you were one of the unfortunate souls who came down with the virus, it might have felt as if a weighty butt of burly bear wrestler in a singlet was dropped on yer chest, holding you down in bed for the day. Grinding his furry hole through the spandex causing you to cough and moan writhing in pain.  Nothing you can do but rest and medicate. When you regain your strength you can roll that Bear meat over and pile drive yer way back to health.

REAL MEN EAT ASS: a T-shirt from

Believe it that I, Mortimer Pye, has sat and pondered this notion, “REAL MEN EAT ASS”(yes in all caps!) In this writer’s humble opinion, there is nothing more beautiful and delectable than a mans butt. Many bottoms have reported to me that most guys they hook up with don’t eat them out proper, if at all, and goddamn it, I think that should change! Thanks to I can use the power of persuasion, and maybe get a date or two, wearing the “REAL MEN EAT ASS” T-shirt at the next bar night or kink party.

(Read the UMM blog post for more information about

The Urban Mountain Man Evolution of the dirty old man

Ok Evolution, stop right there! I mean… Can we go back there? Can I get down there?  I’m sick and tired of this refined bullshit.  Gimme the river, gimme the plane, gimme the forest! But before I get in yer slippery time machine let me grab my guitar, my records, my sketch books and mass produced pens and computers and I’d prolly would like to watch CNN every so often you know… I am SO ready for this retrograde! Hey! Where are you going?


It’s time to POST a LOG!

Ever wake up nic-fitting, and you don’t even smoke? Or maybe you do, but it doesn’t seem right? Everything makes you angry, and rightly so! It’s 3am, and nothing is good on T.V.  Don’t shout at the walls! Go post a log, deep and long! Give in to your anger lust until it feels ridiculous. Beat off like yer beating a drum, Sooth yourself to the rhythm.  Please type the right words, not the wrong ones. Or just do your best, and have fun with it.