All posts by mortimer

“Man Kisses are the Best” Graphic, Soften Hearts, and Harden Dicks, at First View

We at UMM are pro LOVE. To be more specific, we are PRO MANLOVE! We love MEN and we want MEN to love us. We want to be IN LOVE with MEN, with all the entanglements. Nothing says this better than a kiss. Some str8 and bi guys say “I don’t kiss man” but give me a fearless BUD to kiss me gentle, only mashing mouths when the passion calls for it. Dicks pressed up to each other like long lost pubic friends. Arms wrapped into one body mass but feeling utterly naked and at home. Hoping yer dream cums true.

Erotic Art and Sketches for Sale at UMM

Here at UMM we are beginning the process of creating an online shop and/or a gallery with erotic man art and designs for sale. We’re still in the early stages of production so make sure you check back in about month when our “shop” will be open. Until then UMM will be posting images of Mortimer Pye’s drawing and sketching excursions at, Tumblr, and other social media channels. If there are any images on the site that pique yer interest feel free to let us know. Mortimer Pye likes nasty suggestions.

Horny for the Summer Days

Here in Minneapolis we are having a nice warm stretch, lotsa sunshine and warm breezes! Unfortunately we got about 10 inches of snow the week before, so everything is covered with melty muck. I choose to look up and close my eyes, breathe in and fantasize about the summer days. Here are a few vintage studs from the UMM archives that get my heart pumping for the heat!

Big Dan the Van Man

Oh my! It’s Big Dan the Van Man chilling in his van! He might be wearing a wedding band, but don’t worry man,  he understands. Talk about the blues band playing at the stand. Stare at his tan, Sunblock give him a hand. Always good to come with a plan. Because there might be room in that van for one more man, MAN! You never know until you ask Big Dan the Van Man. Big Dan the Van Man

Burly Bear Wrestler Chest Congestion

Yes the flu season was a real Bear this year. If you were one of the unfortunate souls who came down with the virus, it might have felt as if a weighty butt of burly bear wrestler in a singlet was dropped on yer chest, holding you down in bed for the day. Grinding his furry hole through the spandex causing you to cough and moan writhing in pain.  Nothing you can do but rest and medicate. When you regain your strength you can roll that Bear meat over and pile drive yer way back to health. kink slogans for the queers

Slogans are awesome. The best ones can persuade, empower, inform, and even make you chuckle. When you put a slogan on your t-shirt, it’s seen as statement of your own personal beliefs, politics, or identity. With that in mind, what if you are a LGBT kinkster who’s looking for casual apparel that represents your deviant side? What if you’re the type who doesn’t give a rats ass that your kink might get someone else’s fur in a tangle? Where can you go for this type of personal branding? that’s where.

In the late 60s early 70s hippy counter culture slogans were everywhere. When I first started perusing through the many pages of the online shop,, it reminded me of my aunts button collection pinned to the drapes in her teenage pot-den in the basement at grandmas and grandpas house. Slogans like “Homosexuality is a Pain in the Ass“ and “Give Generously to Your Local Sperm Bank” rang through my brain and tweaked my young pervy intellect. carries on this old school hippy biker t-shirt tradition, but for the LGBT and kink communities. The site has a menu for various kink subgroups like Puppy Shirts, Bear Shirts, Transgender, etc. But I suggest you check out the LGBT section which seems to house all of the T-shirt designs from all the subgroups. It’s a good read and you might even get offended, but most likely you will find your dirty little secret boldly printed on a garment you can buy online. I bought “REAL MEN EAT ASS,” a sentiment that I’ve had for a very long time but never pondered that I could find it on a T-shirt. (See my blog review of this T ) This site covers a wide range of sentiments that are expressed with an unforgiving, but lovable, Daddy voice. Some of the slogans are little cliche and some a little wordy, but a lot of them are crafted just right to tweak your brain and get your desire pumping. Using clip art, and Disney style illustrations (mostly of bears and pups,) the designs create a cozy style that is both familiar and perverse. No fancy fonts, just unadulterated easy to understand kinky slogans, that will make your chest stand out for your next party, night on the town, or slutty evening with your buds. is owned by a a Bear, a Cub, and a Pup. They are into roller derby big time and there is a huge section of the site dedicated to the sport. They also have a selection of puppy/animal masks, paws, tails and a few other random fetish items for sale. But the slogans are the big star here. They make the site an entertaining and fascinating read whether or not you plan on making a purchase, but we implore you to make a purchase. We know one will pique your interest. Maybe buy one one for Father’s Day?